Updates from the Docs (July 15th, 2016)

I had 2 appointments today already (it’s 10:45am.  I detest mornings.  They’re much too early for my liking).  One in Milwaukee at 7:00am.  One here in Green Bay at 10:15am.

I made both. (I was a little worried, seeing as how I didn’t know how long my appointment in Milwaukee would take and it’s a 2 hour drive north…plus traffic and construction).  BUT I made both.

The appointment in Milwaukee was with a sports nutritionist.  Did I walk out enlightened?  I mean, 3 years of food journals and plans and learning…how much is there left to learn, really?
Nope.  Not enlightened.  But lightened.  Totally lightened.  Like, I KNEW that I was -for whatever reason- making this a whole lot harder than it has to be.
Basics do rule.  It’s still about calories in verses calories expended.  Macros are involved.  High count/ low count days work for me -and for most people- so back to them.
There are no forbidden foods out there (I have no allergies), but I did do a good job of making notes as to how I feel when I eat certain foods or certain amounts.  And while it doesn’t tell the entire story as to why, it creates a good picture.

So.  What’s changing?  Not a lot.  My intake is 1930, average.  That means my high intake days are about 2200 and my low intake days are 1680.   Ish.  Because energy expended isn’t an exact measurement for me (the apps I use don’t give me anything other than an estimate based on computer generated models of the average woman of may age and weight), calories-in won’t be either.  Calories-in also aren’t perfect, as my measurements of foods isn’t perfect.  While I don’t eyeball weights and volumes anymore (okay.  I have to get back to not eyeballing it), measurements aren’t perfect either.  And no DAY is perfect…so as long as I’m within 50 to 75 of my calorie goals, I’ll be fine.  I really will (probably closer to a long as I’m not under by more than 100 or over by more than 200 it’ll be fine).  Macro spread?  50 – 25 – 25.  Okay.  Pretty much where I’ve been pushing.
Yeah.  There needs to be some “organizing” of when I get calories (when I eat and what I eat when)…but that will always be on-going.  This bi-weekly period, it’s about getting back into intake-cycling and macro spread.
And I’m back to trying to be gluten-light.  I don’t need to be gluten-free.  But I know that I feel better when I lay off the wheat products (my body doesn’t seem to process them as effectively as it could.  There could be a lot of reasons)…so I will.  Basically?  Stay away from breads and pastas…
…also?  White potatoes.  I don’t know what that’s all about, but it’s in my food journal quite predominately, so.  Okay.
It’s okay, too.  Because pastas, breads, potato side dishes?  They’re pretty much “filler” foods anyway.  I don’t need the help feeling full.  I know that if I stay on plan, I eat a shitton of food.
And yeah…I need to make a plan.  I got this.  I know I do.  If all I do is plan one “high” day and one “low” day and cycle the same meals for the next 14 days?  It’s totally cool.  It’s a start.  It’s one step back towards what I need.

Speaking of need?  I need to (okay, the wording was “you SHOULD see…”  and “I’m putting in a referral…”) see a sports trainer.  Apparently 35 years old is indeed old and there’s concern about injury from over-doing-it.  …like what’s the worst I could do, really?  Fall off the skateboard again?  But fine.  Should the referral get approved, I’ll go.  If not?  It’s not a priority for me right now.

How’s my mental health?  I’m still depressed…but I’m doing better.  There are still a lot of times during the day when I’m attempting to process project parts or class lectures that I’m just bleh…and yeah, that’s the best way I can describe it.  I’m writing a LOT at night.  Am I “better”?  Hell no.  But I’m starting to handle things okay again.  I’m still a little worked about a couple of things that I can’t figure out how to solve.  And yeah I’m still WORKING on them.  Hard.  I want them DONE.  And my brain is still struggling through them as I sleep (or do “mindless” shit, like walk).  It’s okay, though.  The rest of the chaos has been restructured into mayhem, mostly.  So it’s smoothing out.

I just want to say that I’m proud of myself for actually GOING to either appointment.  Believe me: I could have rescheduled either for any reason I could have thought of.  I hate dealing with docs and counselors (even ones I appreciate).  But I went anyway.  And yeah, both appointments were nerve-racking.  But I did it.

Now?  I’m going to have a manicure and pedicure.  Because I adulted today, and I can.

Catch y’all on the flip


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